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The Ride that is Marriage



Andrew Walters


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This is the opening monolog for a play that I was planning on writing.  I am coming to the realization that I may not have time to write any more than this.  A friend of mine really thinks it's funny so she told me to put in on this site so others can enjoy it.  Maybe some day I'll finish the play and send the rest too.  Thanks


Ride Attendant: Young men and gentlemen, welcome to Walt Disney World’s new theme ride, The Marriage.  Please step quickly and carefully on to the ride because women do not like to be keep waiting.  Once you are seated, the restrainment harnesses will automatically come down and secure your entire body until you feel like you are suffocating.  (To a certain man) No no sir, there is no turning back now!  Now once the ride begins, you are not allowed to look at any other women in the entire park.  Disney World will not be responsible for a! ny injures obtain by disobeying this rule.  Just a warning men, The Marriage ride is very fun and exciting in the beginning; with lots of ups and downs and climaxes.  But as the ride goes on, it slows to a steady, boring pace that makes you wonder why you ever came on the ride in the first place.  Oh, and if the ride should fail for any reason, you will crash and burn and be sued for everything you’re worth.  Thank you very much and enjoy The Marriage! (Screams are heard in the background as lights fade)


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