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Maya
Part One
By R. Saraswat
A quick gust of wind blew in from the window, kissing Maya's skin. She
shuddered, and got up from her dresser and pushed the window shut.
"There is nothing wrong with a little fresh air," her grandfather
remarked from a chair next to her bed. "You need the air to relax and
calm your nerves."
"You talk as though tonight is a normal night. It is my wedding night.
The house is flooded with guests and relatives who I've never heard of or
seen before. I hardly know the man I am about to marry, and tomorrow is the
beginning of a whole new life. I can't relax and I can't calm my nerves." The
small group of girls sitting at the foot of Maya's bed giggled. There were
about five of them, each dressed beautifully for the wedding.
"Come on! Sit down so we can brush your hair," one of them said. "We're
running out of time."
A black car pulled up to the festively decorated house. A man came out of
the car, shutting the door behind him. He stared at the house. There was
music, lights. and flowers everywhere. The night was still young and the
smell of summer lingered in the air. The man was confused. This was not what
he had expected. As he approached the crowd, he looked everywhere for one
familiar face; the mother of his childhood best friend. And there she was,
carrying a tray of food. She appeared worried, just as he had always was.
"Aunty*!" he called. She spun around to see a grown man. His face was
familiar.
"It's me. Kunal. Maya's best friend."
"Oh God. it's really you!" she hugged him, setting her tray aside.
"Where have you been for so long? You run off after college and the most
we hear from you is in the papers! Had I known where you were I would've
contacted you."
"What's going on? What is this?"
"It's a wedding."
"Is Jaya getting married?"
"No, Jaya married four years ago. Tonight is Maya's wedding." He
stopped breathing.
"Ma..Maya? She's getting married? To who?"
"You seemed surprised Kunal. Did you not think your best friend would
ever get married?"
He tried to laugh, though it was very hard at that moment. "It's not
that. I'm just so surprised."
"I understand. Things change, Kunal. I learned that you can't hold on
to those you love forever. First when my beautiful Jaya left my house
as a bride, and then when my father passed away. And tonight, my other
baby girl is leaving me. It's so hard to take and to understand. But it
happens. It's inevitable. And the only thing that keeps me going is
knowing that Maya will be happy."
"Radha!" called someone.
"I'm coming!" she yelled behind her. "I have to go, Kunal. Please stay.
I know it will mean the world to Maya."
"Where is she?"
"She's in her room. Remember, the room you two played in as children?
You know where it is, right?"
Kunal was staring at the house had known for so long.
"Kunal?" she said. "You know where it is, right?" He snapped out of his
daze.
"Yes, I can find it. Thank you." She left, leaving behind a young man
with a blank expression.
*aunty= typical name you would call a woman older than you.
The stairs were the way he remembered them; cold and stony. Only this time,
the stairs felt cooler under his bare feet, almost as if
uninviting. He reached the top of the stairs to a tiny hallway that
didn't stretch too far. From the end of the hallway was a faint glow. He knew
this was the room he was looking for.
On his way to the other end of the hallway, there were many pictures hanging
up on the wall. There was in fact one of Kunal and Maya, both sitting by a
tree that they used to play on.
"We'll be friends forever." Kunal remembered saying. "I promise." They
were only 10 at the time. The hallway seemed like one big memory. He
remembered after his mother would drop him off to Maya's house how he would
sprint up the stairs and burst into her room. After Kunal went to college,
his mother moved to a different town, so Kunal hadn't seen Maya between then
and now. It was almost as if time froze and waited for this day. He was at
the door. He reached for the knob. The paint had chipped away after the years
had gone by. He stopped himself from opening the door, and he knocked
instead. Something he never had to do at Maya's door.
"Come in." Kunal pushed open the large brown door, and inside he saw a
room that he had left 10 years ago. On the floor were a group of girls, all
eyeing this visitor. On the bed was a man who he could hardly recognize.
Maya's grandfather. And on the chair of her dresser with her back turned to
him was Maya. Her straight black hair was shining as she spun around. She was
beautiful. Her lips were full and red, her skin was fair and her eyes were a
mischievous brown. The candlelight danced in her eyes. Her eyes searched the
visitor as she slowly rose from her chair. Involuntarily, she walked to the
man in the doorway, memories slowly coming together.
She stopped. A smile crept across her face.
"Kunal!" she screamed and immediately hugged him. The girls giggled and ran
out of the room, her hobbling grandfather followed. They were alone in the
room. Kunal didn't notice, for he was too busy savoring the moment. She
smelled of coconut and her embrace was warm. She backed away and looked at
him. "Where have you been?! All this time we read about you in the papers. I
thought I would never see you again! And here you are."
"Maya. I've waited so long for this moment." Kunal said turning around.
He wiped a tear from his eye. He reached into his pocket and felt the
small box, which held an engagement ring.
"You left me. you left and said you'd come back soon. I waited. years
passed. Before I knew it my life was taking sudden changes, and I needed a
friend to be there for me. But there was no one.I needed you. And you weren't
there. Now it's almost as if God is giving a sign, that we really are the
best of friends. You are here for the most important night in my life." As
the tears flowed down her face, Maya beamed with
happiness. "It's strange." She continued. "I'm so happy now. and the
funny thing is that when Ramkumar and I were engaged, I wasn't this happy."
"Are you happy? With this marriage?" asked Kunal with his back still
turned to Maya.
"Am I happy? What does it matter? Happiness will come after my
marriage. After all, I am an Indian girl. We are to love after marriage, never
before."
"Yes." Said Kunal making a fist. "Yes."
"How did you know to come here tonight?"
"I didn't know you were getting married. Maybe it's fate. It can be
cruel."
"Cruel? How so?"
"Well...you didn't invite me to your wedding!"
"An occasional phone call would've been nice! Then perhaps I would've known
where you were... then you can blame me for not inviting you! But that fault
lies with you as much as it does with me, does it not?" Kunal let out a
nervous laugh.
"I suppose."
"So how did you know to come here tonight? I mean, seeing as how you had no
idea I was getting married."
"Well... I was in town and I just dropped by. To see you."
"That's a lie Kunal. People who never lie should never lie. It's obvious
when they try. Now really, why are you hear today? And for God sakes,
can't you turn around and look at me?"
"The truth is." Kunal turned around and looked into Maya's eyes. "The truth
is I came to ask for your hand in marriage." Maya gasped. A gust of wind blew
through the window blowing out all of the candles, leaving the two in
complete darkness.
"I... I know I have matches somewhere." She felt around for them on her
bedside table. She struck a match, and between them a small but powerful
light was glowing. Their eyes met, both speechless. She lit a candle and
picked it up off of it's holder, silently going around and lighting the
other candles in the room. Kunal followed.
"What do you want me to do?" Maya asked, continuing lighting the
candles.
"What is there to do? You are getting married. But I can at least make a
request." Maya froze.
"What sort of request?"
"Marry me instead. I love you." She spun around, dropping the candle
which immediately went out upon touching the cold ground.
"You?? You love me?! How dare you! You disappear for ten years without a
trace and you say you love me?! That doesn't even make sense! Where did you
come up with this lie?"
"Lie? It's not a lie! I've been thinking about you every second of
every minute of... every day! So what if we hadn't seen each other in 10
years? I remembered you. The way you smiled...the way you talked. Your
wonderful sense of humor. And then I realized that we were meant for each
other. And seeing you here today only confirms that. Please..."
"Never." she replied bluntly. There was a knock at the door.
"It's time for you to come down!"
"I'm coming!" yelled Maya. She turned to Kunal. "Leave now. You've
gotten very good at that." He silently walked over to a drawer in her dresser
and plowed through it and pulled out a pink chunni*.
"What are you doing? Get out of my drawers!"
"I'm taking this... you always loved the color pink. Now I can look at this
every day and remember you."
"Get out. Get out!"
"We will meet again Maya. Don't doubt that for a moment."
*chunni- a shawl worn with a traditional indian dress known as salwar
kameez.
"Here we are Maya. It's the night of our wedding."
"I've waited for this for a long time." Maya said, emotionless. They
both sat on the bed of flowers made for them, which was tradition.
"These. these flowers are beautiful," attempted Maya to make
conversation. Raamkumar turned to her.
"These flowers are nothing compared to you." Maya let out a
flattered smile and turned away. She got up from the bed and sat down at the
dresser. In the reflection she
saw Raamkumar walking to her. He kneeled down next to her. She let her
hair out and began brushing it with careless strokes. He took the brush
and put it down on the dresser. Maya remained looking into the mirror.
The reflection was just the empty bed. Raamkumar pushed her hair aside
and started to take off her earrings.
"Promise me something Raamkumar." Maya said meekly. He put her earring
on the dresser and she turned to look at him. "Promise no matter what.
that you won't leave me."
"I can't promise you that I won't leave you. I can promise you that I
will love you for eternity. But we don't have to be in the same place at
the same time to love one another. A man can be separated from his love
for 10 years and still love her just by the thought of her." Maya got up
immediately and started pacing.
"What is it Maya? Is it something I said?" She looked at Raamkumar.
"It's nothing. I suppose I'm just anxious, that's all. This is the day
I used to dream about with all my friends. We talked about the perfect
wedding, the perfect place... the perfect man. And now I realize that I've
gotten everything I wished for." Maya turned around and wiped a tear off
her face.
"There's nothing to be anxious about. We have the rest of our lives. I
promise to make every day a day worth living for you."
"You... promise?"
"I do."
"Welcome back honeymooner!" Maya and her best friend Sonia embraced.
"Look at you, Maya! All glowing and happy. And your house is beautiful!"
They were sitting in the lawn chairs outside, as Sonia had just come to
visit Maya in her new home.
"I reserve the right not to speak to you Sonia! After all you didn't
come to the wedding."
"I told you, Maya! It was basically impossible for me to go! You know
that I wouldn't miss it for the world. But I had to!"
Maya laughed. "I'm only teasing."
"So, where is the unfortunate groom?"
"Shutup!" Maya playfully hit Sonia. "He's at work right now!"
"Oh that's too bad. I wanted to meet him. I thought that's why you
invited me over at this time."
"He'll be home soon."
"All right."
"But Sonia. I need to talk to you about something."
"Something?"
"All right. someone. The night of my wedding. Kunal came to my house."
"Kunal? You mean 10 years ago Kunal?!" Sonia's jaw dropped. "How is
he?"
"He came to ask for my hand in marriage. He had no idea I was getting
married that night and he swore since he disappeared 10 years ago he had
been thinking about me every day. and he fell in love with my memory.
And meeting me confirmed that I suppose. I was so mad I just kicked him
out. but on the inside I was torn in two. I was actually considering
leaving Raamkumar at the wedding for Kunal."
"Do you love Kunal? More than a friend?"
"No."
"Then why would you even consider leaving Raamkumar?"
"I was scared. at least I know Kunal. I would've been happier with him
than a stranger."
"Be that as it may, you really have to forget Kunal. Raamkumar is your
life now. When are you starting work?" Maya looked away. "Maya? He is
letting you work, right?"
"He says it's better I stay home because there is so much to do. But I
really want to dance. It's what I love doing."
"Did you explain that you studied dance and whatever work you do could
be lucrative?"
"It came up. But I suppose the thought of me, a woman, working is just
unacceptable."
"Men are all the same."
"That's not true. Kunal isn't like that. He would let me go out and
dance and live my life."
"Listen to yourself. We aren't even talking about him. You're going to
have to move on. Otherwise you won't last another minute in this
marriage."
"Mother! I'm home!"
"Kunal? Finally! I thought your business trip would last forever!"
"Ma what is this? What's all this lunch you're making?" The kitchen
smelled of spices, and it reminded Kunal that he hadn't eaten in a
while.
"And how was your trip? What was your conference about again?"
"Conference? Oh! Conference. It was about.exporters and the trade
business and how the stock market has been fluctuating," Kunal lied.
"That's very nice dear. Listen, empty all of your dirty laundry in the
basket in the bathroom and come down for lunch."
"Wow! That was your wedding dress? It's gorgeous! I wish I could've
been there to see you wear it!"
"Don't complain Sonia! You decided not to go!"
"Let me see the other things you bought there." Maya pulled out
different Indian dresses from her drawer.
"Wow! These are gorgeous, Maya! Only, where's the chunni to that one?"
"Which?" asked Maya.
"The pink satin one. where's the chunni?" Maya immediately grabbed the
dress and stuffed it back in her drawer.
"It. it must be in my drawer somewhere." Maya let out a nervous laugh.
The clock started chiming and Maya jumped.
"Why are you so jumpy?" asked Sonia. The clock struck one. "Oh my God!
Is it one o'clock? I have to get going. I have an interview today!"
"Oh, well good luck!" Sonia bolted out of the room. Maya looked out at
her mirror on her dresser and walked towards the drawer. She opened it
and pulled out the pink dress. She held it close to her and burst into
tears. "How could I do this?" she sobbed. "How could I." she slowly sank
to the floor, the soft Indian dress in her hands.
Kunal looked at the pink chunni in his suitcase. It was the first thing
he saw when he opened it. Memories of Maya came flowing back into his
brain. He hadn't stopped thinking about Maya since the day he left her
wedding. He pulled a letter out from under his pocket, one that he had
written on the plane. He read it over to himself.
Maya,
I now realize that what I told you the night of your own wedding
could've have easily caused some problems. I was selfish. I went out and
lived my life the way I wanted to, and I had no right marching into your
life and asking for it. The truth is, even though we've been apart for
10 years, I've always loved you. I guess you already knew that because I
told you. But just so that you know. I've never forgotten you. How you
used to laugh. how we used to be together always. I guess I was just
falling in love with memories. Oh well. What's a memory anyway? I hope
your new husband keeps you happy and satisfied. I hope he's good to you
and he never hurts you. Just remember. I am always here for you,
whenever you need me. For now, I have your chunni to remember you by,
and that's good enough for me. I can keep that for the rest of my life
and remember you. You will always be with me.
Love,
Kunal
He folded the letter and put it into an envelope. He prayed Maya would
read it.
"Maya darling! So good to see you!"
"Kajal aunty! What an unexpected surprise!" Maya said through gritted
teeth. "Please come in!" Kajal bounced her way into the house. Maya
stayed at the door and rolled her eyes. "God help me." She muttered.
"What was that?" Kajal asked from inside the house. Maya spun around
and smiled. "Nothing Kajal aunty!"
"Kajal aunty!" Raamkumar yelled. He knew how much Maya detested her
Kajal aunty, so he loved it when she came over. Kajal was a family
friend of Maya's. She was in her 40s, stout, loud, obnoxious, bossy, and
extremely nosey. She had a reputation for gossiping and meddling in
other people's affairs. "Come, sit Kajal aunty! Maya and I are just
positively thrilled you stopped by." Behind Kajal's back Maya mouthed to
Raamkumar that she was going to kill him. Raamkumar just smiled.
"Tell me, aunty, can I get you something?"
"Do you have any Brandy?"
"Brandy? You mean. a drink? It's almost 9:00 am. are you sure?"
"I like to get a jump start on my day."
"One Brandy coming up."
"Maya darling!" yelled Raamkumar artificially. "Let me help you!" As
soon as they reached the kitchen Maya slammed the door shut and turned
to Raamkumar. "Don't pretend to be the perfect husband! I want her out
of this house! Soon she'll start with the questions, then the stories.it
just won't end!"
Raamkumar couldn't help but to laugh. "Look, she's no big deal. Don't
even listen to her. Just put on your best behavior."
"Oh I'll try, Raam, I will. But the moment this Brandy gets into her
system and she starts being all loud, she's out of her. And don't be
surprised if I strangle her before she leaves." Raamkumar burst out
laughing. When they entered the living room Kajal was looking through
drawers, but she immediately stopped when they entered the room.
"Tell me something Maya darling. how much was this house?"
"I'm not too sure. We bought it so quickly that I don't even remember."
"Well it can't be that much. after all it is.shall we say, petite."
Maya clenched her fist.
"Here's your drink." Kajal took a sip.
"It's.its very good dear." She said. But it was obvious it wasn't.
"So, Raamkumar, how much money do you make a year?"
"Aunt Kajal! Please! That's inappropriate." Maya scolded.
'Um. why don't we all sit down, hm?" Raamkumar suggested.
"Yes, some of us need to cool our tempers." Kajal commented. "Now,
when's the baby due?"
"Baby? What baby?"
"Well, you must be trying for a baby. Uphold family tradition."
"We haven't discussed it yet."
"Well you should. You should've been pregnant by now."
"Kajal Aunty, why did you come here?"
"Simpy to check on my favorite newlywed couple, of course. Although
clearly I caught you at a bad time." She turned to Raamkumar. "Hot
flashes. It's obviously that time of the mo."
"Kajal aunty! Leave now. Please."
"Well. If you insist on being rude to your elders, I will be leaving.
Sorry I couldn't finish the Brandy. It tasted to cheap for me. Don't
bother showing me out." With that, Kajal got up and left the house,
slamming the door behind her.
"That's it, Raam! I can't stand it anymore. She's never coming here
again."
"Should you be pregnant now?"
"What?"
"I mean. I want a child. And I hope you want a child. So what are we
waiting for?" Maya turned away surprised.
"Are you saying that we should have a baby? You and I?"
"If not, who else?" They both looked at each other and started
laughing. They embraced.the longest embrace they had ever had. "Yes!"
she said. She only said it once; once was all it took. They both knew
exactly what it meant.
My dearest Maya,
Today, my letter must have reached you. I am writing another one so
that eventually you will get fed up and write back. I miss you dearly. I
was walking alone in the park the other day and I saw so many couples.
They were happy as anything. They were in love. I realized then that it
was way past my time to get married, and that I should do it soon. But
with who? And should I marry a girl and ruin the rest of her life
because my love grows for another woman? I cannot do that, and I won't.
So I will remain alone for the rest of my life. until you are in my
arms.
Love you always,
Kunal
He put the second letter in the mailbox, hoping the love of his life
would read it soon.
"Raamkumar and Maya! My favorite newlywed couple. Come in!"
"Thank you doctor Sharma," Maya said.
"Now, what's this I hear about the two of you wanting a child?"
"Yes. We have discussed everything, and this is definitely what we
want."
"I see. Now Maya, your records haven't reached this hospital yet from
your old one. So to be safe, I don't want to suggest anything before I
know for sure that it's a safe bet. Actually, the records should be in
by tomorrow, so if you could stop by then."
"Doctor? Tomorrow?"
"It's ok Maya. Tomorrow will be fine, doctor."
"I understand your impatience. Yours too, Raamkumar."
"Me? Impatient? Of course not doctor!"
"Even the strongest man can't hide it. It's just a matter of hours
before you will know whether or its possible, and rest assured I am
almost 100 percent sure that there will be no complications. You have
nothing to worry about."
"Well then, we best be on our way." Said Raamkumar.
"Thank you doctor," said Maya. "We will see you tomorrow."
"Maya! What's this in the mail?" Maya was in the bathroom brushing her
teeth, while Raamkumar was checking the mail.
"What's what in the mail?"
"This letter. It's addressed to you but there is no return address."
"Honey, it's probably junk mail. But shouldn't you be gone to work now?
You have a meeting, remember!"
"Yes, yes I know. Now remember, I will be back at 6 tonight so we can
go to the hospital together."
"Bye!" Maya heard the door shut. She rinsed our her mouth and went
downstairs, seeing the white envelope on the table. "I swear," she said
to herself, "If it's another offer for the women's committee..." she
froze. It was the letter Kunal had sent.
"He's apologizing, Maya. He realized the complications his visit on
your wedding night could have caused. See? There's nothing to worry
about."
"I understand that. but what if Raamkumar finds it?"
"Throw it away."
"No! I can't do that!"
"Then hide it from him."
"But don't you see? I haven't hidden anything from him ever. And it
doesn't matter if I throw away the letter or not, the fact is another
man loves me and I am hiding it from him. There shouldn't be secrets in
this marriage."
"But what if you tell him? It will obviously arouse suspicion. You
can't have that either. Listen to me. Throw away the letter and forget
anything ever happened. It will be better in the long run."
"We're about to start a new life with a baby. Everything is going to
change. with this secret in the picture, I don't know if I can live with
myself."
"Maya, if you say anything to him, he might not be able to live with
you. There's no telling what he might do. Don't say a word."
"Maya, Raam. Have a seat."
"What's wrong doctor?" asked Maya.
"We recieved your records today. I think just to be sure, we should run a
couple of tests today."
"What sort of tests? Is something wrong with me?"
"Well, the other hospital can't exactly be trusted anymore. There was a huge
file error and therefore the entire hospital had to be shut down, which is
why you are coming to this hospital today. The results on your last checkup
are very unclear, which is why by running a few tests, we can figure out if
everything is OK."
"When will we find out how everything went?"
"If everything goes well, you can find out today."
"How are you doing Maya?" They were in the hospital now, after the tests were
over.
"I feel like a lawnmower has been shoved up my rear end and is currently
running on my insides."
"Ouch... that doesn't sound to good."
"Everything will be ok, won't it? I mean this whole mix up... I'm sure it was
nothing more than a little confusion."
"I have a feeling, inside of me, that everything is OK. You don't have to
worry. Because I'm here with you."
Maya nodded. "You're right." The doctor came in.
"Hello Maya, hello Raam. The results are in. I'm sorry."
When Maya woke up, the wind was blowing outside. The branches scratched
against the window. She didn't know where she was. It took a couple of
minutes for her eyes to adjust. She was in her bedroom. A few hours earlier
Raamkumar brought her home from the hospital and as she was devastated, she
slowly fell asleep. She glanced at
the clock. Half past midnight, and Raamkumar wasn't next to her. A flick And
then she saw the note on her bedside
table.
"Gone out, be back soon. love RK." She sighed. Just then, she
heard a clonking up the stairs. Before she knew it, Raamkumar was
standing in the doorway. His arm was around a man's shoulder, a man Maya
didn't recognize. She got up from her bed.
"What happened to him?"
"I'm the bartender at the bar a couple of blocks down. Your husband
came in and he had a little too much to drink, so I brought him home. I
couldn't let him drive like this. You can pick up the car in the
morning."
"Thank you sir. This is very kind of you."
"Sure. And m'am? Be careful. His behavior is definitely far from nornal."
"I'll be fine, thank you."
"I'll show myself out then." She turned to her husband, propped up on his
arms, giddy with drunkenness.
"So, how goes it?"
"Why did you do this?"
"Why d'you think?"
"Is this because of the baby?" He hiccuped.
"Baby? What baby? You can't have no baby, remember?"
"I can't believe you would actually go out and do this to yourself. I'm
sleeping on the couch tonight."
"Oh come on... stay. Chat a while"
"Go to sleep." She reached for her pillow when all of the sudden, he grabbed
her wrist.
"Let me go! Let me go before I hurt you, Raamkumar. Let me go."
" Now you just wait a minute. Don't you talk to me in that tone."
"This is the last time. Let go of my or... or I'll call the police!"
"You won't call anyone." He slapped her across the face. Maya's world froze.
Her face immediately burned. She made a fist and threw it into his stomach,
sending him backwards onto the bed.
She opened the closet and took out her suitcase and started throwing clothes
in.
"What, you're leaving now? Is that how it is?" he moaned from the bed. "Fine!
What are you going to tell your mother, that you left me? I'm sure she would
hate to have her dreams of having any grandchildren shattered. All it takes
is a little call from my part."
"You wouldn't do that to me. Because I know you well. And the moment you snap
out of this... this influence you're under, you will regret every word you
spoke to me." She zipped up her suitcase and walked to the door.
"And what if I don't? What if I don't regret anything I've done or said to
you tonight?"
"Then... then we're through." Maya slammed the door behind her.
In part 2: Raamkumar and Kunal have a showdown, Maya and Kunal spend more
time together...and by the end of part 2, one of these three people's lives
will hang in the balance.
